Oh? You've been?
Well... no. But I assume it has trees, and lakes, and such.
No doubt it does.
Why the shade then?
In Eurovision, at least, Lithuania is the least successful of the three Baltic states. The other two, Latvia and Estonia, have each won the competition once, and have sent in some excellent songs over the years. Lithuania has not. Distinctly so.
THE MISTAKEN PROPHECY
The closest Lithuania have ever come to winning was with this slice of nonsense:
People are booing! Terrible.
It was a divisive entry, no doubt.
Silly lyrics, megaphones, obvious attempts at pandering to several languages - what's not to like?
The music.
So they weren't the winners?
No. The title proved to be wrong. But they did finish 6th, which is the best they've ever done. For the opposite case, see Iceland's unfortunately named 'All out of Luck' which, finishing a close second, did indeed live up to its title.
BEST EYEBROW ACTION
They never stop moving:
Magnificent.
BEST TEAR-AWAY
Everyone likes a good reveal.
Sparkly underwear, taut political commentary, fake instruments, a vague understanding of music - this song has it all! You're telling me the 'winners of Eurovision' guys did better than this gem?
They did.
Travesty!
MOST DUBIOUS FASHION CHOICE
A hard call, this one. On the one hand, there's this sci-fi leather daddy ballerina situation:
Umm...
But on the other hand, there's this distinct sartorial choice:
Uhh...
MOST EFFECTIVE
As far as I'm concerned, Lithuania have never done better than this:
Aww, sweet. But that's a bit... normal, no?
It's happy, shiny, and just a little too earnest at times. What more do you want?
Dancers in gimp masks? Explosions? References to European medieval history?
I forgot you're that kind of fan.
THIS YEAR'S CONTENDER:
So, will Lithuania manage to finally get that win this year?
No.
Are you su-
NO.
Bu-
Oh.
Yeah. Let's not linger here. Next up: Serbia!
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